While going through some of my stuff, I found this College Ring that was given to me many years ago by an "Ex." I remember trying to return it, not understanding how I would keep something that was incredibly important to someone else. And the response I received was, "I sincerely gave it to you, so why would I take it back because we aren't together anymore?" I have now had this ring for over a decade, and it is a part of my journey. I understand that some people may feel the need to delete all memories of a broken relationship. If it was toxic, yes you should.
When I sever relationships - friendships, business partnerships, intimate relationships, I remember that they are a part of my journey…people and memories that mattered to me at some point in my life. I don't suddenly just forget the existence of everyone and everything. Moving on isn't always about forgetting, sometimes it's about acknowledging the Whats and Whys and not being afraid to care about people because the world tells you its "old baggage," and that to enjoy the new, you must forget the old. I acknowledged and thanked my son's father in the book #ThisThingCalledPurpose. As I always say, I am committed to Honesty. He is a part of my life's journey.
Finding this ring reminded me to be thankful that God doesn't move on from us, even when we move on from Him. He doesn't say He will forget the good times we've had with him. He doesn't throw away everything we have shared, because our relationship with Him has changed. I think that part of true awareness is your ability to own your journey, to care about what YOU care about, and to express yourself without fear of criticism. Many times this means being able to find meaning to the various parts of your journey, and acknowledging the existence of these parts even where you have moved on.
xx
Adaora ‘Lumina’ Mbelu